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Negaunee, Michigan May 24-26, 2024
This is me. I’m 40 something years old. I’ve lived a life that … well, kind of sucks and is kind of enchanted. I’ve loved. I’ve lost. I’ve gained. I’ve learned. And most of all (and most importantly), I’m learning to move on. That picture was just taken today while I was on Lake Michigan…
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Feelings about Me & The Future
It has been an extraordinary adventure. I’m fourty (murmurs random number) years old. I’ve been dealing with PTSD largely since I was 11 years old. My feelings were large and I had no one to really help me unpack them. Go to the therapist my mom says. Her therapist. Karen. I didn’t want her. I…
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I Might Be My Age
The last few weeks have been rough. Well, the last……. lots of years have been tough. I can honestly say that I haven’t participated much. Sure, I’ve worked. I’ve worked hard. I’ve done work at home. I’ve been trying to be more present. In my relationships and in my world. I’ve tried to realize what…
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What IS PTSD? How Do I Have It?
PTSD hasn’t been recognized for that long, clinically. PTSD is recognized globally as a Mental Health Diagnosis. It’s become part of the DSM in the United States in the 1980’s. Although it’s been described for approximately 3000 years. According to Herodotus’ description of an Athenian soldier that became blind after the Battle of Marathon in…
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Criminal/Bad/Evil/Unusual/Ugly Behavior
I think everyone throughout time (mostly) that experienced trauma (abuse, neglect, incest/molestation/rape, crime, poverty…. etc), people will find a way to adapt. Positively or negatively. I like choose your own adventure books. I like the opportunity to be a woman and to be able to use her voice. I like that I have the freedom…
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I Hung Up
I listen to victims statements or their statements to police in all sorts of podcasts or recording made in tv shows true crime based. I was recently listening to a podcast about Libby Caswell and her death. The end of the podcast series, there were a group of women recounting their own domestic violence stories. I guess it…
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Trauma & Me
It’s hard to remember the good things. It honestly is. And after so much criticism from people who purported to love me, I almost shut down my blog. I decided to keep going because after all, this is for me. Not for anyone else. I started out with this as a means of reflecting on my life. I realize that…
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Coming Together
There’s a lot to say for the tough stuff in life. You can put a cherry on top, if you’re so inclined. I didn’t have that ability. After the interview, I’ve taken on a few things. My responsibilities may change soon, a bit. I’m not sure. I’ve examined what I want and don’t want in…
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The Peripheral & Aftershocks
My episode has aired! 79: Cursed (peripheralpod.com) So, it finally happened! My episode has found its way to the internet, for better or for worse. I received some positive and negative feedback. It’s been a struggle. For me, the over reaching reason that I did the podcast was because I wanted people to know the…
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Tying it all together
My life is a complicated mess. Tying together the family dysfunction, the RYR2 gene mutation, my rebelliousness, and the IALC (Independent Apostolic Lutheran Church – or Laestadianism.) My family (or at least four generations back) came from Finland. Lars Levi Laestadius created this religion called Laestadianism. It’s Lutheran. IALC is founded with the ideas of…