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PTSD – Floor Jansen
This song is from Floor Jansen’s first solo album. It’s a powerful anthem discussing PTSD. While I enjoy her style better in Nightwish, she’s an incredible talent.
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Emotions – Anxiety + 10
I think it’s fair to say that there are expectations. Expectations for manners, behaviors, attitudes, driving, well.. living. One thing that I can say is that my anxiety has driven me to worry about everything. Last Thursday, I was so angry when I got home from work. One of my sewing coworkers was on vacation…
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Letting Go…. Not 15 Years Old Anymore
I’ve had PTSD for quite a while now. I guess I didn’t realize how my brain changed during my traumatic experiences growing up. And after I grew up… (*kinda*) I have always wanted to be better than I was. Thinking that I was still 15 years old, I saw everyone as not liking me. Or…
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5/18/25. I am finally enough
I look at myself now, and I see things differently. When I was a teenager, I was allowed to do things I should never have done. I made choices to avoid being alone. And my ability to determine who was safe and was not, I had no ability to sense. I saw a very small…
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Teeth, Quality, and Breaking Down
I had all my teeth removed by the time I was in my 20’s. I didn’t exactly care for myself. Depression and poverty. Not fun times. Insurance will cover removal of teeth at $0 copay to over $1000 for a root canal and crown. I had two kids and a husband. I had no money.…
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Thoughts of a Child to an Adult. The RSV Edition.
So… here I am. Sitting in my kitchen at the island. The island that I own. The husband that sits upstairs working on his crafting. The dogs resting comfortably on the couch. The dishwasher running in the background. The beauty of the environment outside. And the relative peace that exists in my life among the…
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Purpose and Goal
My purpose for putting together this blog was for me to sort out my feelings – about… why? Why do all these people seem to have such amazing lives. Their makeup, their clothes, their jobs/careers, homes/apartments/condos, children, cars…. (or any combination of these). They are perfect. Their pictures on social media with the hashtags and…
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Safety – Feeling Denied (Until I Left)
I hated what the Upper Peninsula of Michigan represented as a kid. Many people from outside of that area looked at it as … well, undeveloped and people were hicks. Drink beer, go to jail, sing stupid songs, go to deer camp, and lose MANY MANY IQ points in the process. I didn’t feel like…
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Weekend & Holiday Anxieties/Depression
I wish I could say that depression didn’t have a hold on me. I’m not looking for attention, I’m exhausted. My husband and his mounting medical needs and unemployment for 10+ years and me getting older, more stressed, and tired. Holidays mean I get to spend time with family. Maybe not the way it used…
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Love & Support
Foreigner created a song called “I Want to Know What Love is” in 1984. I think everyone alive on this giant rock we call Earth wants to have Love. Love without support is little help sometimes. Even the most aboriginal group of people rely on their brothers and sisters in their community (respectively, not literally).…
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Learning about Me 