It’s really quite awkward to say this, but I’ve had a major breakthrough about myself and my life this year. Life truly is about the suffering and how we conquer or fall apart. Life isn’t purely hell, it’s a huge challenge. MAJOR. I’m finally starting to feel like I’m NOT the sum of my problems. Or what I’ve done. I am who I wish to become because I am a believer in all things possible. (To an extent). I’ve struggled for my entire life to figure out what I’ve encapsulated in less than a paragraph. If you can avoid being me, I’d recommend it. (Or, maybe I wouldn’t…)

It’s a weird dichotomy. Isn’t it? I hate the fact that I would recommend anyone to suffer. Yet my greatest challenges brought me the most awakenings. I felt so trapped by the circumstances that brought me pain. I could never imagine coming out of it. And I lived on the poor me train forever. I always felt like I was the victim, despite having a warrior inside.

I started noticing that I needed to do things for my body, things I didn’t want to do… Mentally. It goes against all my years of training. I’ve noticed the swelling in my feet and around my wrists. I’ve noticed that my body favors most pressure on my left side. So I’m going to make a point to go to the chiropractor. I’m going to drink water, on purpose. I’m trying to set my sights on a better Janet than the one I’ve taken down all these years trying to “improve myself”. Instead, I’ve been allowing myself to do things that aren’t good for me. I have no idea how exactly I’m going to do it.

I really am afraid of trying to eat right. That means I have to consciously do things right. And I’ve never been good at that. I think I’m going to need some help here. Anyone a life coach that works pro bono? 😉

Work in progress…..